Bonding in Congo

Bonding with my son.

Luke and I co-slept the entire time we were in Congo. I LOVED it! Once we started bonding, he would wake me up sometimes by rubbing my face or patting my arm or rub my back. This is what I would do to him if he wasn't awake for the 7am breakfast call. He would reach out in the night just to touch me or hold my hand. It was very sweet and touched my heart in a mighty way. It's amazing really. The feelings of love that sweep through you at different times as you bond with your child. Sometimes, late at night, I would look at him and think, "wow, he's mine. I'm so not worthy but thank you God." He's an amazing little boy that was meant to be a Solberg. He had such a rough start and was moved around too many times. It affected him. So much trauma in his short life. I cried when I thought about it then, I cry when I think about it now. He did not smile, make eye contact, barely cried for almost a week and a half. He was a limp noodle in my arms. It was the strangest thing. I really had to hold onto him. As time went on, I continued to try and make eye contact and when I did, I made sure I was the first to look away. That way he could feel free to stare at me, to get used to me without direct eye contact. I constantly touched him though, stroked his face, kissed him, rubbed his back, whispered to him telling him I loved him. His first sound was the moaning/groaning while eating. It was funny, cute and so very sad for me. Then I would catch him staring at me from across the room and when I would look at him and connect he would stop what he was doing and come to me. The bond was forming-between a mother and her son. The feelings were overwhelming at times for me. His eyes spoke to my heart in a way that words could never do. His eyes spoke of pain, heartbreak, fear and a distrust that at times seemed insurmountable. I wanted to climb inside and piece his little heart back together.

His little body was filled with parasites. He could never get full. There is no telling how long he had them. But he had a tummy full and the more I thought about it the angrier I became. He could have eventually died from this. He had been in foster care for 6 months. He should have had the medicine long before I got there. I never dealt with parasites before, much less these monsters. While the sight of them freaked me out, knowing his precious little body was filled with these, broke my heart for what he had to feel like. We live in a country where we don't have to worry with this, but this is life in Congo.

Each day brought us closer together as mother and son. My heart felt like it was wrapping around his. Every day I prayed for him to feel safe. This little boy and I were learning about each other. He was learning my voice, I was learning his cry. He was learning my scent, I was learning his. He was learning my touch, I was learning his personality. He was learning trust and I was learning his heart. We were learning to love as a mother and son, together.

When he first smiled at me, I felt the breath escape from my lungs. I fought hard and prayed hard for that smile. For me, the first smile represented a change towards trust, letting go of fear. From the first smile came his first sounds. Then came the laughter. There are no words to describe my feelings when that happened. Praising God with tears in my eyes and a heart overflowing with joy. I was overwhelmed with so much emotion. To see the smile and hear the laughter and for both to reach his eyes; his eyes-the window to his heart and soul. Finally. Laughter reached his heart. And stirred my soul as I fell completely in love with my little boy.

I'm so thankful, words can't desribe, that God put adoption back on my heart and pressed me until I could not ignore Him anymore. I simply cannot imagine my life without him. I love this boy more than words can say. He captured my heart half-way around the world and I am still overwhelmed that God chose me to be his "mama".

I am so lucky.

I am so very blessed.

Tidbits and such

Wow, it's been over a month since my last post! I didn't realize that until today. I don't have any pictures downloaded yet so this is just a catch-up post for now.

My life:

~The first week of July I went to Church camp in Alabama, with Cade. I thought it was crazy hot. Little did I know what was ahead for us in Texas!!

~Cade had soccer camp the week after Church camp so I was driving him around everyday.

~The next week my Uncle died from a heart attack. We made a very quick trip to Kentwood, Louisiana and my kids got to meet some family they've never met before.

~Came home on Wednesday and re-packed for a trip to San Antonio for our annual China adoption reunion (Jeff had to stay and work). That week was an extreme adventure, traveling without Jeff. Hopefully I don't have to do that anytime soon again.

~This week I've been cleaning like crazy, getting ready for school. We start next week. I have cleaning projects to be posted!!

~I'm painting this weekend!! Our living room, dining area, hallway, and front entry need a facelift.

That's it for now. Busy, Busy, Busy. Surely things will slow down when school starts?

Snippets And Such

Sometimes I just don't have a lot to say about any one specific topic but I know sometimes family and friends like to know what's going on in our lives.

~I'm overwhelmed today, yesterday and maybe tomorrow. I can't keep up with my tiny
tornadoes and this house

~Cade finished baskeball camp today.

~Cloee is talking pretty darn good these days. And it's so cute when she tells me, "Mama No" and wags her finger at me.

~My two oldest children are having relationship issues, I'm going to pull my hair out or beat them (that's a joke, lighten up)-maybe just drag out the "spanking spoon"-mama means business when that comes out.

~We wrap up our school year next Tuesday, Cade only has History these days.

~I'm working on next year's schedule and curriculum (that's a later post).

~We survived our first homeschool year. Lots of yelling, crying, fit-throwing, laughter, joking and Cade did some too. :)

~I love homeschooling.

~Cade and I leave July 4th (Happy Birthday Julie!) for Church camp in Alabama for a week-very excited. Our special babysitter will be with the girls everyday.

~I'm still struggling with my weight loss.....that I don't post about anymore.

~I love running, again.

~My keyboard is sticking, hmmmm.

That's all I have right now.

Life, Computer Crashes and Chopped Hair

I've missed blogging but I'm back.....did you know I was gone?? haha. My computer crashed. It was a sad day. I thought I had lost all of my pictures and my favorites and all of the stuff that you think you would die if you "lost." So far though I have found he was able to save a lot of my stuff, even my "favorites" which included tons of homeschool blogs and resources. I did lose some pre-K homeschool curriculum that I purchased-it was on my computer screen and now it's all gone. Some fabulous unit studies for Cade that he picked out on horses, dolphins, a Christmas one and several others. That makes me sad but I guess I can just purchase those again maybe. The unit studies were on a crazy sale and I'm cheap so that may not happen. :(
Jenna chopped her hair up and this time did a pretty good job at it. It was actually right around Thanksgiving. She was drawing and said it got in her way. We had a nice long talk about the advantages of pulling our hair up in a pony tail or barrettes (sp?) as opposed to just cutting off what's in the way. One piece at the very front is about 1/2 an inch long or shorter. So we're finally about to go get it cut and see what they can do. I'm thinking layers on the side.....

Cade finished up his soccer season and has started basketball, well, practice anyway. Games start in January. Jeff is his coach this year and Cade was very excited that he decided to do it again.

We are on Christmas break now until the 2nd week in January. Cade finished up the semester doing pretty good! We did have to back-track in Grammar one week because I just felt like he wasn't "getting it"-that's the nice part of homeschool-we can go over it until he does get it. Can't do that in public school, you just have to keep moving forward even if you don't understand the concept. He is a math whiz, so he's doing good in that class-very good. I think his reading is wonderful despite being dyslexic and having an auditory processing disorder. I'm proud of him!!

There is an on-line dyslexic class that I want to take-the teachers in Texas have to take it to become certified to teach dyslexia classes. It's kind of expensive, around $400 I think but I know it will help me teach Cade. We'll see.....

My mom is moving near us!!! Yea! We've been trying to get her closer for years. She found a house in the little bitty town next to us, so she'll be about 15 minutes from us now. She moves next week!

Cloee is still growing like a weed and is LOUD! She makes herself known in this house among the 3 kids. She has a mouth full of teeth and we can understand a few words that she says. Her favorite and most popular saying is "hungeeee" for "I'm hungry, feed me!" She says it all of the time. She eats wayyyyyyy more than Jenna does! She's in 18-month clothes and size 5 shoes. I think she'll be moving to 24-month clothes soon. I'm thinking I just need to buy 3 outfits because she grows so fast. She has a closet full of clothes and soon we're going to have to start all over again. Perspective: Jenna is in 3T clothes right now. I'm thinking little sister will pass her in the next year.

That's it for now! Hopefully one more post before Christmas!!

Boy, time flies when you're having fun!

Yikes, I didn't realize my last post was in February. A lot has been happening in my life: February 26th was my last day at my job-I am now a stay-at-home mom. February 27th Jeff and I celebrated our 11 year anniversary-not a huge celebration-I was hit with a stomach virus! March 4th Cade celebrated his 10th birthday! I just cannot believe my baby is 10 years old-or as he says "double digits now!" Spring break was last week and I really enjoyed having all 3 kids home with me. We really didn't do much-it was just nice not having to be somewhere by 8am.

Cloee had her 6 month check-up and is developmentally on target-yea! She weighed in at 14 lbs and measured 25-1/2 inches long. She's got some chunky legs-which I just think are the cutest thing ever. She likes to hold her bottle and the girl is a chatter box - non stop! Can't understand what she's saying but that doesn't stop her.

I think I'm adjusting to being at home. I don't have the free time like I thought I would to clean but I'm hoping we can get a schedule going soon. Part of the problem is that Jenna seems to be extra clingy. I'm not sure why and quite honestly it gets frustrating because I don't know what's going on. She stands beside me and will cry until I pick her up or she will wrap her arms around my leg and not budge. She follows me around the house like she doesn't want me out of her sight- she's happiest when I sit with her and not do anything, but I simply cannot do that all day. So, I'm not sure what's going on. I'm doing a lot of praying and counting to ten to remain patient because honestly I feel like pulling my hair out sometimes. Hopefully, this is just a stage and she will become comfortable knowing I'm at home and just moving around the house. We'll see.......

Cade is loving me being at home because it means I pick him up from school. This really is so much better for him because his medicine has not worn off and we get homework done without all the fighting, etc like before. So that's our rule; home work is completed as soon as he comes home, then he can play until dinner. He's not complained about it once. I love it!!

I'm getting ready to start buying his 4th grade homeschool items. I've decided for sure that we will be doing the Switched on Schoolhouse for his Language Arts. Cade has dyslexia and I've heard good things about this program for the dyslexic student. That's about as far as I have gotten. I keep wavering on his other classes. I've read that unit studies are very good for the ADHD student, so I just started researching the Weaver curriculum. Science will most likely be the Apologia curriculum, but I forgot what it's called for his age group. I actually talked with some parents about this and they loved it. All of this is biblically-based and that is what I love the most. It will be very challenging with the two girls here, but I know it can be done. I follow many homeschooling blogs so I have some ideas on things to try.

Jenna's birthday is next month-hard to believe she will be 3! She has told us she wants a Tinkerbell party. So we're going to have a Tinkerbell party at our house! She has become stubborn about pottying. So we have some issues there, but I don't push it - she'll decide at some point she wants to go on the potty. She knows.....she's just stubborn.

That's it for now....xoxo Lauree

Jenna's dancing skills

Fun-Filled Friday

Got my casty-thing off of my arm and the stitches removed yesterday.  Now wearing a removable splint and will start PT next week.  It hurts pretty good right now because it's not bound and gravity is messing with it.  But it's nice to have that thing off.  I just have to sing praises for my husband, he has been amazing.  On top of bathing the girls every night and making sure the house is clean, he has made sure the kitchen is clean every night before we go to bed.  The kitchen is a pet-peeve of mine and I don't like getting up to dirty dishes in the sink.  Does it happen?  Sure, we're not perfect.  But Jeff has really helped on that.  I love you sweetie!!

Cloee is now rolling over.  She is just growing like a weed and she has the cutest smile.  We are at home today because of, all things, snow.  It's beautiful and not common here.  The kids have been having a ball.  Jenna is now at the sitter with Cloee until I finish my job-my last day is February 26th and I am on the count down!  She seems to enjoy it and I know she likes being with Cloee.  Cade is wrapping up his basketball season tomorrow and then our Saturdays are free for quite some time.  He chose not to play in Upward Soccer because he wanted a break and I said a quite prayer of thanks!

I am very excited about becoming a stay-at-home mom.  I never believed I could do this but God has opened those doors for me and it is the right and best thing for me to do.  I guess the big news is that I will also begin homeschooling Cade in August.  We are both very excited.  We've committed to a year and I think it will continue on.  Yes, I have done a great great deal of research and prayed just as much.  I'm excited that my son will be taught from a Christian point of view and the science books say "God created this and He created that".  When I asked Cade what electives he wanted, his first answer was, "I want to learn more about the Bible-is there a class on that?"  I can't tell you how good my heart felt, what a sweet young man.  Jeff is totally on board with this decision and was involved in the research during that stage.  If you have a viewpoint or a question, send them to me.  Would love to hear it.  Everyone that we have talked has been so very supportive.  I have to say honestly I was a little surprised, but definitely in a good way.

The case of the missing camera cord

I'm still sad and still missing my camera cord. Where oh where is my camera cord? So, looks like today will be filled with verbage from me-I know that's exciting. Jenna has discovered a new favorite past-time. Sneaking my cell phone and making phone calls. Typically it's Jeff she has phoned but this morning she also called my friend Alicia. It's now in the kitchen, on the counter, and locked.

I go back to work on monday. I need a moment of silence...............
Big sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Cade has started basketball. He plays for Whitehouse and RA basketball at our church. Two games every Saturday for a few weeks. Jenna thinks she's a princess. She wraps everthing around her shoulders and struts through the house saying, "i a pwincess" and you must agree or she will continue to say it until you lose your mind. She's also gotten into monsters these days, as in being scared of them. We're not sure where that came from, but when her room is dark she'll run from it screaming "monstas". Cloee is sleeping through the night! She's also getting fairly chunky these days. She is definitely a thumb sucker and still hates the car seat, but she's a little better. I put her in her bumbo seat last night and it was the funniest thing. Her feet don't even touch the ground. She seemed to like it though and she's got great head and neck control. So she sat there as pretty as you please and watched the kids. Oh yeah, Cade has gone through a growth spurt I guess. We got into an argument over his jeans this morning. I told him his jeans were too short they must be the 7's to go put on his 8's and he argued that they were 8's. And I of course argued back that no way were those his 8's and I pulled the tag out....wait for it....and much to my chagrin (did i spell that right?), my son was right. Oops, I'm so sorry and yes I did tell him that. When did he grow? I just bought those when school started. Guess I'll be going to look for some 9's - slim, of course, this weekend. That's all for now.

Playing catch up

Yes, this blog is still alive! I have lost temporarily misplaced, my camera cord. So for now because I'm so organized unorganized there will be no pictures. Christmas came and went and it was wonderful to have all my babies with me. Jenna is really getting into the Christmas materialism present opening thing and Santa - very cute to watch her. Cloee, decided she was bored and slept through most of it. And Cade knew the TRUTH this year but that didn't hinder his excitement one iota. It was a great Christmas!

Our gameroom is officially complete and we love it! Maybe one day I'll be able to post pictures. Cades tv and gaming systems were moved in here, the computer desk, the treadmill (it's not a clothes hanger anymore!), hand-me down couch from a friend, and an assortment of toys. We are good to go. Can't wait to post pictues of my pantry. LOVEEEEEEEEEEEEE my pantry. All of my baking stuff is organized and I can actually see what I have.

Cade went back to school today and I also sent Jenna to daycare-I really need to clean my house and sometimes, well, it's just easier when you're almost alone to get alot done. I go back to work one week from today. I'm kinda sad, oops, I mean excited about it. (for my coworkers who actually read my blog). That's it for now. Hopefully I will find my camera cord soon.

Mugshot Tuesday?

Just doesn't have the same ring to it. The renovations are almost complete on our new game room. I'm so excited! Maybe they'll be done before Christmas and we'll be able to get our tree down and at least decorate it for Christmas. Cade gets out of school on Friday for a couple of weeks-yea! I have a friend staying with me during the day this week-Emmy. Jenna is loving having a friend here to play with.

Cloee is 3 months old today

December 1st. Cloee was born 3 months ago today. She had a pretty rough start but she is a strong little girl. She is thriving and is such a sweet baby. Her doctor appointment went great although she was not happy with her 3 shots-poor baby. She weighed in at 9lbs 7oz-gained 1lb 2oz since her medical appointment in Congo. She is also 22-1/4 inches long now. She was about 20 inches in Congo. She's growing! After some issues with formula we have found one she has adjusted to and she is a much happier baby as is her parents. :) When she first came home she was waking every 30 minutes to 1 hour and wanted a little sip of formula-she would take about an ounce. She is now sleeping 3-5 hours at a time and takes in 4-6 ounces of formula at a time. We are liking this routine much better!! Last night she took a bottle around 10pm and then woke only once during the night around 3am for a bottle. I can live with this. Sometimes she wakes up twice during the night but more often it's only once if we plan the feedings just right. :)

She has the most beautiful smile that lights up her eyes. She loves talking and cooing to you. She has wonderful head movement and she prefers sleeping on her stomach. The doctor was impressed with her head control and lifting. She is developmentally on target-Praise God! She's little but on target. The kids love her. Cade does fine with her and not sure if I mentioned it in the last post but he has turned into an amazing helper with the house, animals, and sisters. I just can't say it enough. He really helps me out and does so many chores around the house without complaining (most of the time-he is a typical child!).

Jenna is doing great with her. I'm not sure what I expected but really I don't see a lot of jealousy. I have her watch Cloee which makes her feel very important and she can be in charge of giving her the pacifier if she needs it. She does like to sit in my lap along with Cloee which is always interesting.

We had a great Thanksgiving and it felt truly amazing to have all of my children with me. What a blessing indeed. My mom came over on Thanksgiving day and we ate and stuffed ourselves. The kids love it when she comes over-I think she spoils them! Then we went to Kingwood to visit with Jeff's family and also had a great time. Jenna adores her cousins Hannah and Megan-they just doted on her. Hannah did a great job with her and is going to make a great babysitter. She wanted to do everything her cousins did. Very cute!

The guys arrived today to close in our garage-I'm so very very very excited! This will be a game room for the kids-think I said that earlier. Should be ready in about a week or so. I absolutely cannot wait to have this extra space....okay, so I'm really dreaming about that huge pantry-closet I will have for all of my baking supplies, pans, etc. Yippee!

That's it for now. Cloee is napping so I need to go clean the kitchen.

And then there were five.

She is home and she is perfect. Cloee made it to the US on Wednesday morning and we spent the day and evening in airports and on airplanes-missed flights, delayed flights. I was grumpy, she was perfect! Just one pictures for now. We were at the airport in Charlotte, North Carolina and I was changing her into warmer clothes-it was very cold there. She started trying to talk to me and smiling. So very cute. We are trying to establish our routine-without much success. We've started another new formula and it seems to be sitting on her tummy better. I promise I will post more pictures in a few days!!

Adoption, Halloween, Renovations

Time sure is flying these days. Halloween came and went. The kids had a great time going to our church for the fall festival. Jeff and I were attacked by very mean stomach bugs and so my mom came and took the kids for us. They had a grand time. I didn't even realize that when Cade said he would dress up as a football player, he and Jenna would match. He was a Longhorn football player and Jenna was a little Longhorn cheerleader. Her outfit was a gift from some friends back when we first adopted her.

We are doing some more remodeling to our house I guess you could say since we won't be moving any time soon. We live in what you could say is a "cozy" home. So with the addition of our 3rd child soon it will become even, well, "cozier." So we've decided to close in the garage and make a large playroom. So the picture below with Jeff is Stage 1 of the remodel. This is the very 1st thing we had to do in order to get ready and that was get Jeff a shed-doesn't he just look very happy. He has wanted his "own" shop forever and now he has one. There is a large walk-in closet thing in our garage that will now become my pantry/cake baking accessory closet and I have wanted one of these forever and now I will have one. It's a win-win situation. The remodel is scheduled to begin December 1st and we are so excited. It will add about 400 square feet to our "cozy" house!

The adoption is moving along very nicely. The adoption decree has been issued and now I believe we are in the final stages. What those are, who knows. Please be in prayer for this for us over the next week. These next few days are important. It's so hard to believe that Cloee will soon be home!

Yep, I did it.

I joined Facebook. I did it. It's interesting. I don't know half of what I'm doing but it is a great way to keep up with friends.

Cade is flying home to Houston today around 4:30. He won't be getting in until really late, 10:30pm I think. He'll stay there until Friday when we join him. He's had a great time!

Updates on life

Just a few pics for today. Cade had his Spring musical at school. They were all so cute! Jenna celebrated her 2nd birthday last weekend. It's so hard to believe that she is already two. Even harder to believe that Cade turned 9 in March! WOW! We had a very small party for Jenna at the park. I forgot to send out invitations so if you didn't get one I apologize-just not on top of my game right now. I will plan better next year.....hopefully! Family came, at least I did remember to tell them and then I texted a couple of friends. But it turned out cute. The wind nearly blew us and the cake away! Those pictures will come another day. I've been very busy with cake orders to raise funds for "Cassie". Yes, we've pretty much decided to name her after either my great-grandmother or great-great gm. I'll have to look at my baby book again. Already I have raised almost $250.00 so that more than covers the application fee which is $200.00. Yea!!! If you'd care to sponsor Cassie in this adoption feel free to make a donation! :) Also, we will be setting up an account with Our Family Adoptions so people can officially donate should they want to. I'm excited that I've made this much money on my cakes! But I have been soooo busy! But that's totally okay if it means bringing little Cassie home sooner!



Cade and Keegan helped decorate Jenna's cake!

Jenna enjoying donuts on her birthday-yum!

Not too crazy about getting stuff on her hands though

Cade and his "very special" friend at the musical

Cade performing-he's good at that!